Body: | Augusta Triumphans
Or, The Way To Make London The Most Flourishing City In The Universe.
By suppressing pretended Madhouses,
where many of the Fair Sex are unjustly confined,
while their Husbands keep Mistresses, &c.,
and many Widows are locked up for the sake of their Jointure.
Daniel Defoe
1728 AD
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Introduction:
In 1728 AD, Daniel Defoe, author of Robinson Crusoe, believed that a
husband could drive his sane wife mad by sending her to a mad house. He
believed insanity was caused by life circumstance, not a disease saying,
"it is much easier to create than to cure madness". He wrote about a new
phenomonea "a practice scarce heard of till of late years" of the rise of
private mad houses and the jailing of unwanted rich wives by treacherous
husbands in some of these mad houses. Whereas mad houses had been run for
altruistic purposes by church ministers, Defoe shows the rise of many new
mad houses by non-church ministers for profit by housing the relatives of
rich people or their unwanted wives. "the vile practice now so much in
vogue among the better sort as they are called, but the worst sort in fact;
namely, the sending their wives to madhouses, at every whim or dislike,
that they may be more secure and undisturbed in their debaucheries; which
wicked custom is got to such a head, that the number of private madhouses
in and about London are considerably increased within these few years."
Since mad houses were originally started by ministers of churches, this
sudden surge in the number of mad houses marks the beginning of the profit
motive of running mad houses by non-ministers. There is simply no way that
altruistic ministers would jail unwanted wives so their husbands could
spend the wive's money on their new mistress. "How many, I say, of beauty,
virtue, and fortune, are suddenly torn from their dear innocent babes, from
the arms of an unworthy man, whom they love, perhaps, but too well, and who
in return for that love, nay probably an ample fortune and a lovely off
spring besides, grows weary of the pure streams of chaste love, and
thirsting after the puddles of lawless lust, buries his virtuous wife
alive, that he may have the greater freedom with his mistresses?" But Defoe
also believes that the causes of insanity is life circumstances and not a
disease. He notes, "If they are not mad when they go into these cursed
houses, they are soon made so by the barbarous usage they there suffer ...
Is it not enough to make any one mad to be suddenly clapped up, stripped,
whipped, ill-fed, and worse used? To have no reason assigned for such
treatment, no crime alleged, or accusers to confront? And what is worse, no
soul to appeal to but merciless creatures, who answer but in laughter,
surliness, contradiction, and too often stripes ... be not sufficient to
drive any soul stark staring mad, though before they were never so much in
their right senses" Defoe traces the etiology directly back to the husband
as the cause of insanity, not some disease: "When by this means a wicked
husband has driven a poor creature mad, and robbed an injured wife of her
reason, for it is much easier to create than to cure madness, then has the
villain a handle for his roguery; then, perhaps, he will admit her
distressed relations to see her, when it is too late to cure the madness he
so artfully and barbarously has procured." Another factor is that it was
the rich who initially paid for mad houses for the upkeep (or jailing) of
their relatives. In this case it was the wife who was rich and the husband
who used her money: "and he has not a shilling but what came from her" ...
"for if a man is weary of his wife, has spent her fortune, and wants
another, it is but sending her to a madhouse and the business is done at
once." Defoe calls for all mad houses to be regulated and seeks for new
licenced mad houses to be created in various parts of town. "In my humble
opinion, all private madhouses should be suppressed at once, and it should
be no less than felony to confine any person under pretence of madness
without due authority. For the cure of those who are really lunatic,
licensed madhouses should be constituted in convenient parts of the town,
which houses should be subject to proper visitation and inspection, nor
should any person be sent to a madhouse without due reason, inquiry, and
authority." Defoe is an important marker in history for he shows the
genesis of mad houses run by non-church ministers for rich people. (Augusta
Triumphans, Daniel Defoe, 1728 AD)
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Augusta Triumphans, Daniel Defoe, 1728 AD
Augusta Triumphans: Or, The Way To Make London The Most Flourishing City In
The Universe.
FIRST, By establishing an University where Gentlemen may have Academical
Education under the Eye of their Friends.
II. By an Hospital for Foundlings.
III. By forming an Academy of Sciences at Christ's Hospital.
IV. By suppressing pretended Madhouses, where many of the Fair Sex are
unjustly confined, while their Husbands keep Mistresses, &c., and many
Widows are locked up for the sake of their Jointure.
V. To save our Youth from Destruction, by clearing the Streets of impudent
Strumpets, suppressing Gaming Tables, and Sunday Debauches.
VI. To save our lower Class of People from utter Ruin, and render them
useful, by preventing the immoderate use of Geneva: with a frank Explosion
of many other common Abuses, and nicontestible Rules for Amendment.
CONCLUDING WITH
An effectual Method to prevent Street Robberies.
AND
A Letter to Coll. Robinson, on account of the Orphans' Tax.
By ANDREW MORETON, Esq.
THE SECOND EDITION.
LONDON:
Printed for J. ROBERTS, in Warwick Lane, and sold by E. NUTT, at the Royal
Exchange; A. DODD, without Temple Bar; N. BLANDFORD, at Charing Cross; and
J. STAGG, in Westminster-Hall. " [Price One Shilling.']
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A MAN who has the public good in view, ought not in the least to be alarmed
at the tribute of ridicule which scoffers constantly pay to projecting
heads. It is the business of a writer, who means well, to go directly
forward, without regard to criticism, but to offer his thoughts as they
occur; and if in twenty schemes he hits but on one to the purpose, he ought
to be excused failing in the nineteen for the twentieth sake. It is a kind
of good action to mean well, and the intention ought to palliate the
failure; but the English, of all people in the world, show least mercy to
schemists, for they treat them in the vilest manner; whereas other nations
give them fair play for their lives, which is the reason why we are
esteemed so bad at invention.
I have but a short time to live, nor would I waste my remaining thread of
life in vain, but having often lamented sundry public abuses, and many
schemes having occurred to my fancy, which to me carried an air of benefit,
I was resolved to commit them to paper before my departure, and leave, at
least, a testimony of my good will to my fellow-creatures.
But of all my reflections, none was more constantly my companion than a
deep sorrow for the present decay of learning among us, and the manifest
corruption of education; we have been a brave and learned people, and are
insensibly dwindling into an effeminate, superficial race. Our young
gentlemen are sent to the universities, it is true, but not under restraint
or correction as formerly; not to study, but to drink; not for furniture
for the head, but a feather for the cap, merely to say they have been at
Oxford or Cambridge, as if the air of those places inspired knowledge
without application. It is true we ought to have those places in reverence
for the many learned men they have sent us; but why must we go so far for
knowledge? Why should a young gentleman be sent raw from the nursery to
live on his own hands, to be liable to a thousand temptations, and run the
risk of being snapped up by sharping jilts, with which both universities
abound, who make our youth of fortune their prey, and have brought misery
into too many good families? Not only the hazard of their healths from
debauches of both kinds, but the waste of their precious time renders the
sending them so far off very hazardous. Why should such a metropolis as
London be without an university? Would it not save considerably the expense
we are at in sending our young gentlemen so far from London? Would it not
add to the lustre of our state, and cultivate politeness among us? What
benefits may we not in time expect from so glorious a design? Will not
London become the scene of science? And what reason have we but to hope we
may vie with any neighbouring nations? Not that I would have Oxford or
Cambridge neglected, for the good they have done. Besides, there are too
many fine endowments to be sunk; we may have universities at those places
and at London too, without prejudice. Knowledge will never hurt us, and
whoever lives to see an university here, will find it give quite an other
turn to the genius and spirit of our youth in general.
How many gentlemen pass their lives in a shameful indolence, who might
employ themselves to the purpose, were such a design set on foot? Learning
would flourish, art revive, and not only those who studied would benefit by
it, but the blessing would be conveyed to others by conversation.
And in order to this so laudable design, small expense is required; the
sole charge being the hire of a convenient hall or house, which, if they
please, they may call a college. But I see no necessity the pupils have to
lie or diet there; that may be done more reasonably and conveniently at
home, under the eye of their friends; their only necessary business at
college being to attend their tutors at stated hours; and, bed and board
excepted, to conform themselves to college laws, and perform the same
exercises as if they were actually at Oxford or Cambridge.
Let the best of tutors be provided, and professors in all faculties
encouraged; this will do a double good, not only to the instructed, but to
the instructors. What a fine provision may here be made for numbers of
ingenious gentlemen now unpreferred? And to what a height may even a small
beginning grow in time?
As London is so extensive, so its university may be composed of many
colleges, quartered at convenient distances: for example, one at
Westminster, one at St. James's, one near Ormond-street, that part of the
town abounding in gentry; one in the centre of the Inns of Court, another
near the Royal Exchange, and more if occasion and encouragement permit.
The same offices and regulations may be constituted, cooks, butlers,
bed-makers, &c., excepted, as at other universities. As for endowment,
there is no need, the whole may be done by subscription, and that an easy
one, considering that nothing but instructions are paid for.
In a word, an academical education is so much wanted in London, that
everybody of ability and figure will readily come into it; and I dare
engage, the place need but be chosen, and tutors approved of, to complete
the design at once.
It may be objected, that there is a kind of university at Gresham college,
where professors in all sciences are maintained, and obliged to read
lectures every day, or at least as often as demanded. The design is most
laudable, but it smells too much of the sine cure; they only read in term
time, and then their lectures are so hurried over, the audience is little
the better. They cannot be turned out, it is a good settlement for life,
and they are very easy in their studies when once fixed. Whereas were the
professorship during good behaviour, there would be a study to maintain
their posts, and their pupils would reap the benefit.
Upon second thought, I think colleges for university education might be
formed at Westminster, Eton, the Charter-house, St. Paul's, Merchant
Tailors, and other public schools, where youth might begin and end their
studies; but this may be further considered of.
I had almost forgot the most material point, which is, that his majesty's
sanction must first be obtained, and the university proposed have power to
confer degrees, &c., and other academical privileges.
As I am quick to conceive, I am eager to have done, unwilling to overwork a
subject; I had rather leave part to the conception of the readers, than to
tire them or myself with protracting a theme, as if, like a chancery roan
or a hackney author, I wrote by the sheet for hire. So let us have done
with this topic, and proceed to another, which is:
A proposal to prevent murder, dishonour, and other abuses, by erecting an
hospital for foundlings.
IT is needless to run into a declamation on this head, since not a sessions
passes but we see one or more merciless mothers tried for the murder of
their bastard children; and, to the shame of good government, generally
escape the vengeance due to shedders of innocent blood. For it is a common
practice now among them to hire a set of old beldams, or pretended
midwives, who make it their trade to bring them off for three or four
guineas, having got the ready rote of swearing the child was not at its
full growth, for which they have a hidden reserve; that is to say, the
child was not at man's or woman's growth. Thus do these impious wretches
cheat the world, and damn their own souls by a double meaning, which too
often imposes on a cautious, merciful, and credulous jury, and gives wicked
murderers means to escape and commit fresh sins, to which their acquitters,
no doubt, are accessory.
I wonder so many men of sense as have been on the jury have been so often
imposed upon by the stale pretence of a scrap or two of child-bed linen
being found in the murderer's box, &c.; when, alas! perhaps, it was never
put there till after the murder was committed; or if it was, but with a
view of saving themselves by that devilish precaution; for so many have
been acquitted on that pretence, that it is but too common a thing to
provide child-bed linen beforehand for a poor innocent babe they are
determined to murder.
But, alas! what are the exploded murders to those which escape the eye of
the magistrate, and die in silence? Add to this, procured abortions and
other indirect means which wicked wretches make use of to screen themselves
from the censure of the world, which they dread more than the displeasure
of their Maker.
Those who cannot be so hardhearted to murder their own offspring
themselves, take a slower, though as sure, a way, and get it done by
others, by dropping their children, and leaving them to be starved by
parish nurses.
Thus is God robbed of a creature, in whom he had breathed the breath of
life, and on whom he had stamped his image; the world of an inhabitant, who
might have been of use; the king of a subject; and future generations of an
issue not to be accounted for, had this infant lived to have been a parent.
It is therefore the height of charity and humanity to provide against this
barbarity, to prevent this crying sin, and extract good, even out of evil,
by saving these innocent babes from slaughter, and bringing them up in the
nurture and fear of the Lord; to be of benefit to themselves and mankind in
general.
And what nearer, what better way can we have, than to erect and to endow a
proper hospital or house to receive them, where we may see them tenderly
brought up, as so many living monuments of our charity; every one of them
being a convincing proof of a Christian saved, and a murder prevented?
Nor will this be attended with so much charge as is imagined, for we find
in many parishes, that parents have redemanded their children, on increase
of circumstances, and paid all costs, with a handsome present in the
bargain; and many times when a clandestine marriage is cleared up and
openly avowed, they would purchase the first-fruits of their loves at any
rate. Oftentimes a couple may have no more children, and an infant thus
saved may arrive to inherit a good estate, and become a be nefactor where
it was once an object of charity.
But let us suppose the worst, and imagine the infant begot in sin and
without the sanction of wedlock; is it therefore to be murdered, starved,
or neglected, because its parents were wicked? Hard fate of innocent
children to suffer for their parents' faults! Where God has thought fit to
give his image and life, there is nourishment demanded; that calls aloud
for our Christian and human assistance, and best shows our nobleness of
soul, when we generously assist those who cannot help themselves.
If the fault devolved on the children, our church would deny them baptism,
burial, and other Christian rites; but our religion carries more charity
with it, they are not denied even to partake of our blessed sacraments, and
are excluded no one branch or benefit accruing from Christianity; if so,
how unjust are those who arraign them for their parents' faults, and how
barbarous are those parents, who, though able, make no provision for them,
because they are not legitimate. My child, is my child, let it be begot in
sin or wedlock, and all the duties of a parent are incumbent on me so long
as it lives; if it survives me, I ought to make a provision for it,
according to my ability; and though I do not set it on a footing with my
legitimate children, I ought in conscience to provide against want and
shame, or I am answerable for every sin or extravagance my child is forced
or led into, for want of my giving an allowance to prevent it.
We have an instance very fresh in every one's memory, of an ingenious, nay
a sober young noble man, for such I must call him, whose either father was
a peer, and his mother a peeress. This unhappy gentleman, tossed from
father to father, at last found none, and himself a vagabond forced to
every shift; he in a manner starved for many years, yet was guilty of no
capital crime, till that unhappy accident occurred, which God has given him
grace and sense enough to repent. However, I cannot but think his
hard-hearted mother will bear her portion of the guilt, till washed away by
a severe repentance.
What a figure might this man have made in life, had due care been taken? If
his peerage had not been adjusted, he might at least have been a fine
gentleman; nay, probably have filled some hand some post in the government
with applause, and called as much for respect as he does now for pity.
Nor is this gentleman the only person begot and neglected by noble, or
rather ignoble parents; we have but too many now living, who owe their
birth to the best of our peerage, and yet know not where to eat. Hard fate,
when the child would be glad of the scraps which the servants throw away!
But Heaven generally rewards them accordingly, for many noble families are
become extinct, and large estates alienated into other houses, while their
own issue want bread.
And now, methinks, I hear some over-squeamish Indies cry, What would this
fellow be at? would not he set up a nursery for lewdness, and encourage
fornication? who would be afraid of sinning, if they can so easily get rid
of their bastards? we shall soon be overrun with foundlings when there is
such encouragement given to whoredom. To which I answer, that I am as much
against bastards being begot, as I am for their being murdered; but when a
child is once begot, it cannot be unbegotten; and when once born, it must
be kept; the fault, as I said before, is in the parents, not the child; and
we ought to show our charity towards it as a fellow-creature and Christian,
without any regard to its legitimacy or otherwise.
The only way to put a stop to this growing evil, would be to oblige all
housekeepers not to admit a man and woman as lodgers till they were
certified of their being lawfully married; for now-a-days nothing is more
common than for a whoremonger and a strumpet to pretend marriage, till they
have left a child or two on the parish, and then shift to an other part of
the town.
If there were no receivers, there would be no thieves; if there were no
bawdyhouses, there would be no whores; and though persons letting lodgings
be not actual procurers, yet, if they connive at the embraces of a couple,
whose marriage is doubtful, they are no better than bawds, and their houses
no more than brothels.
Now should anybody ask how shall this hospital be built? how endowed? to
which I answer, follow the steps of the Venetians, the Hamburghers, and
other foreign states, &c., who have for ages past prosecuted this glorious
design, and found their account therein. As for building a house, I am
utterly against it, especially in the infancy of the affair: let a place
convenient be hired. Why should such a considerable sum be sunk in building
as has in late public structures, which have swallowed up part of the
profits and dividend, if not the capital, of unwary stockmongers?
To my great joy I find my project already anticipated, and a noble
subscription carrying on for this purpose; to promote which I exhort all
persons of compassion and generosity, and I shall think myself happy, if
what I have said on this head may anyways contribute to further the same.
Having said all I think material on this subject, I beg pardon for leaving
my reader so abruptly, and crave leave to proceed to another article, viz.:
A proposal to prevent the expensive importation of foreign musicians, &c.,
by forming an academy of our own.
IT will no doubt be asked what have I to do with music? to which I answer,
I have been a lover of the science from my infancy, and in my younger days
was accounted no despicable performer on the viol and lute, then much in
vogue. I esteem it the most innocent amusement in life; it generally
relaxes, after too great a hurry of spirits, and composes the mind into a
sedateness prone to every thing that is generous and good; and when the
more necessary parts of education are finished, it is a most genteel and
commendable accomplishment; it saves a great deal of drinking and
debauchery in our sex, and helps the ladies off with many an idle hour,
which sometimes might probably be worse employed otherwise.
Our quality, gentry, and better sort of traders must have diversions; and
if those that are commendable be denied, they will take to worse; now what
can be more commendable than music, one of the seven liberal sciences, and
no mean branch of the mathematics?
Were it for no other reason I should esteem it, because it was the
favourite diversion of his late majesty, of glorious memory; who was as
wise a prince as ever filled the British throne. Nor is it less esteemed by
their present majesties, whose souls are formed for harmony, and who have
not disdained to make it a part in the education of their sacred race.
Our nobility and gentry have shown their love to the science, by supporting
at such prodigious expense the Italian opera, improperly called an academy;
but they have at the same time shown no small partiality in discouraging
anything English, and overloading the town with such heaps of foreign
musicians.
An academy, rightly understood, is a place for the propagation of science,
by training up persons thereto from younger to riper years, under the
instruction and inspection of proper artists; how can the Italian opera
properly be called an academy, when none are admitted but such as are, at
least are thought, or ought to be, adepts in music? If that be an academy,
so are the theatres of Drury-lane, and Lincolns-inn Fields; nay, Punch's
opera may pass for a lower kind of academy. Would it not be a glorious
thing to have an opera of our own, in our own most noble tongue, in which
the composer, singers, and orchestra, should be of our own growth? Not that
we ought to disclaim all obligations to Italy, the mother of music, the
nurse of Corelli, Handel, Bononcini, Geminiani; but then we ought not to be
so stupidly partial to imagine ourselves too brutal a part of mankind to
make any progress in the science? By the same reason that we love it, we
may excel in it; love begets application, and application perfection. We
have already had a Purcel, and no doubt there are now many latent geniuses,
who only want proper instruction, application, and encouragement, to become
great ornaments of the science, and make England emulate even Rome itself.
What a number of excellent performers on all instruments have sprung up in
England within these few years? That this is owing to the opera I will not
deny, and so far the opera is an academy, as it refines the taste and
inspires emulation.
But though we are happy in instrumental performers, we frequently send to
Italy for singers, and that at no small expense; to remedy which I humbly
propose that the governors of Christ's Hospital will show their public
spirit, by forming an academy of music on their foundation, after this or
the like manner.
That out of their great number of children, thirty boys be selected of good
ears and propensity to music.
That these boys be divided into three classes, viz., six for wind
instruments, such as the hautboy, bassoon, and German flute.
That sixteen others be selected for string instruments, or at least the
most useful, viz., the violin and bass-violin.
That the remaining eight be particularly chosen for voice, and organ, or
harpsichord. That all in due time be taught composition. The boys thus
chosen, three masters should be elected, each most excellent in his way;
that is to say, one for the wind instrument, another for the stringed, and
a third for the voice and organ, &c.
Handsome salaries should be allowed these masters, to engage their constant
attendance every day from eight till twelve in the morning; and I think
100l. per annum for each would be sufficient, which will be a trifle to so
wealthy a body. The multiplicity of holidays should be abridged, and only a
few kept; there cannot be too few, considering what a hinderance they are
to juvenile studies. It is a vulgar error that has too long prevailed all
over England to the great detriment of learning, and many boys have been
made blockheads in complaisance to kings and saints dead for many ages
past.
The morning employed in music, the boys should go in the afternoon, or so
many hours, to the reading and writing school, and in the evening should
practice, at least two hours before bed-time, and two before the master
comes in the morning. This course held for seven or eight years, will make
them fine proficients; but that they should not go too raw or young out of
the academy, it is proper, that at the stated age of apprenticeship, they
be bound to the hospital, to engage their greater application, and make
them thorough masters, before they launch out into the world; for one great
hinderance to many performers is, that they begin to teach too soon, and
obstruct their genius.
What will not such a design produce in a few years? Will they not be able
to perform a concert, choir, or opera, or all three, among themselves, and
overpay the charge, as shall hereafter be specified?
For example, we will suppose such a design to be continued for ten years,
we shall find an orchestra of forty hands, and a choir or opera of twenty
voices, or admitting that of those twenty only five prove capital singers,
it will answer the intent.
For the greater variety they may, if they think fit, take in two or more of
their girls, where they find a promising genius, but this may be further
considered of.
Now, when they are enabled to exhibit an opera, will they not gain
considerably when their voices and hands cost them only a college
subsistence? and it is but reasonable the profits accruing from operas,
concerts, or otherwise, should go to the hospital, to make good all former
and future expenses, and enable them to extend the design to a greater
length and grandeur; so that instead of 1,500l. per annum, the price of one
Italian singer, we shall for 300l. once in ten years, have sixty English
musicians regularly educated, and enabled to live by their science.
There ought, moreover, to be annual probations, and proper prizes or
premiums allotted, to excite emulation in the youths, and give life to
their studies,
They have already a music school, as they call it, but the allowance is too
poor for this design, and the attendance too small, it must be every day,
or not at all.
This will be an academy indeed, and in process of time they will have even
their masters among themselves; and what is the charge, compared with the
profits, or their abilities?
One thing I had like to have forgot, which is, that with permission of the
right reverend the lords spiritual, some performance in music, suitable to
the solemnity of the day, be exhibited every Sunday after divine service.
Sacred poesy, and rhetoric may be likewise introduced to make it an
entertainment suitable to a Christain and polite audience; and indeed we
seem to want some such commend able employment for the better sort; for we
see the public walks and taverns crowded, and rather than be idle, they
will go to Newport market.
That such an entertainment would be much preferable to drinking, gaming, or
profane discourse, none can deny; and till it is proved to be prejudicial,
I shall always imagine it necessary. The hall at the hospital will contain
few less than seven hundred people, conveniently seated, which at so small
a price as one shilling per head, will amount to 35l. per week; and if the
performance deserve it, as no doubt it will in time, they may make it half
a crown, or more, which must considerably increase the income of the
hospital.
When they are able to make an opera, the profits will be yet more
considerable, nor will they reap much less from what the youths bring in
during their apprenticeship, when employed at concerts, theatres, or other
public entertainments.
Having advanced what I think proper on this head, or at least enough for a
hint, I proceed to offer,
That many youths and servants may be saved from destruction were the
streets cleared of shameless and impudent strumpets, gaming tables totally
suppressed, and a stop put to sabbath debauches.
The corruption of our children and servants is of importance sufficient to
require our utmost precaution; and moreover, women servants (commonly
called maid-servants) are such necessary creatures, that it is by no means
below us to make them beneficial rather than prejudicial to us.
I shall not run into a description of their abuses; we know enough of those
already. Our business now is to make them useful, first by ascertaining
their wages at a proper standard.
Secondly, by obliging them to continue longer in service, not to stroll
about from place to place, and throw themselves on the town on every
dislike.
Thirdly, to prevent their being harboured by wicked persons, when out of
place; or living too long on their own hands.
As for their wages, they have topped upon us already, and doubled them in
spite of our teeth; but as they have had wit euough to get them, so will
they, I doubt not, have the same sense to keep them, and much good may it
do those indolent over-secure persons, who have given them this advantage.
However, if they are honest and diligent, I would have them encouraged, and
handsome wages allowed them; because, by this means, we provide for the
children of the inferior class of people, who otherwise could not maintain
themselves; nay, sometimes tradesmen, &c., reduced, are glad when their
children cease to hang upon them, by getting into service, and by that
means not only maintaining themselves, but being of use in other families.
But then there ought to be some medium, some limitation to their wages, or
they may extort more than can well be afforded.
Nothing calls for more redress than their quitting service for every idle
disgust, leaving a master or mistress at a nonplus, and all under plea of a
foolish old custom, called warning, nowhere practised but in London; for in
other places they are hired by the year, or by the statute as they call it,
which settles them in a place, at least for some time; whereas, when they
are not limited, it encourages a roving temper, and makes them never easy.
If you turn them away without warning, they will make you pay a month's
wages, be the provocation or offence never so great; but if they leave you,
though never so abruptly, or unprovided, help yourselves how you can, there
is no redress; though I think there ought, in all conscience, to be as much
law for the master as for the servant.
No servant should quit a place where they are well fed and paid, without
assigning a good reason before a magistrate. On the other hand, they should
receive no abuse which should not be redressed; for we ought to treat them
as servants, not slaves; and a medium ought to be observed on both sides.
But if they are not restrained from quitting service on every vagary, they
will throw themselves on the town, and not only ruin themselves, but
others; for example, a girl quits a place and turns whore; if there is not
a bastard to be murdered, or left to the parish, there is one or more
unwary youths drawn in to support her in lewdness and idleness; in order to
which, they rob their parents and masters, nay, some times, anybody else,
to support their strumpets; so that many thieves owe their ruin and
shameful deaths to harlots: not to mention the communication of loathsome
distempers, and innumerable other evils, to which they give birth.
How many youths, of all ranks, arc daily ruined? and how justly may be
dreaded the loss of as many more, if a speedy stop be not put to this
growing evil? Generations to come will curse the neglect of the present,
and every sin committed for the future may be passed to our account, if we
do not use our endeavours to the contrary.
And unless we prevent our maid-servants from being harboured by wicked
persons when out of place, or living too long on their own hands, our
streets will swarm with impudent shameless strumpets; the good will be
molested; those prone to evil will be made yet more wicked, by having
temptations thrown in their way; and, to crown all, we shall have scarce a
servant left, but our wives, &c., must do the household-work themselves.
If this be not worthy the consideration of a legislature, I would fain know
what is. Is it not time to limit their wages, when they are grown so wanton
they know not what to ask? Is it not time to fix them, when they stroll
from place to place, and we are hardly sure of a servant a month together?
Is it not time to prevent the increase of harlots, by making it penal for
servants to be harboured in idleness, and tempted to theft, whoredom,
murder, &c., by living too long out of place? and I am sure it is high time
to begin the work, by clearing the public streets of night-walkers, who are
grown to such a pitch of impudence that peace and common decency are
manifestly broken in our public streets. I wonder this has so long escaped
the eye of the magistrate, especially when there are already in force laws
sufficient to restrain this tide of unclean-ness, which will one day
overflow us.
The lewdest people upon earth, ourselves excepted, are not guilty of such
open violations of the laws of decency. Go all the world over, and you will
see no such impudence as in the streets of London, which makes many
foreigners give our women in general a bad character, from the vile
specimens they meet with from one end of the town to the other. Our
sessions' papers are full of the trials of impudent sluts, who first decoy
men and then rob them; a meanness the courtesans of Rome and Venice abhor.
How many honest women, those of the inferior sort especially, get loathsome
distempers from their husband's commerce with these creatures, which
distempers are often entailed on posterity; nor have we an hospital
separated for that purpose, which does not contain too many instances of
honest poor wretches made miserable by villains of husbands.
And now I have mentioned the villany of some husbands in the lower state of
life, give me leave to propose, or at least to wish, that they were
restrained from abusing their wives at that barbarous rate, which is now
practised by butchers, carmen, and such inferior sort of fellows, who are
public nuisances to civil neighbourhoods, and yet nobody cares to
interpose, because the riot is between a man and his wife.
I see no reason why every profligate fellow shall have the liberty to
disturb a whole neighbourhood, and abuse a poor honest creature at a most
inhuman rate, and is not to be called to account because it is his wife;
this sort of barbarity was never so notorious and so much encouraged as at
present, for every vagabond thinks he may cripple his wife at pleasure; and
it is enough to pierce a heart of stone to see how barbarously some poor
creatures are beaten and abused by merciless dogs of husbands.
It gives an ill example to the growing generation, and this evil will gain
ground on us if not prevented; it may be answered, the law has already
provided redress, and a woman abused may swear the peace against her
husband, but what woman cares to do that? It is revenging herself on
herself, and not without considerable charge and trouble.
There ought to be a shorter way, and when a man has beaten his wife, which
by the by is a most unmanly action, and great sign of cowardice, it be
hoves every neighbour who has the least humanity or compassion, to complain
to the next justice of the peace, who should be empowered to set him in the
stocks for the first offence; to have him well scourged at the
whipping-post for the second; and if he persisted in his barbarous abuse of
the holy marriage state, to send him to the house of correction till he
should learn to use more mercy to his yoke-fellow.
How hard is it for a poor industrious woman to be up early and late, to sit
in a cold shop, stall, or market, all weathers, to carry heavy loads from
one end of the town to the other, or to work from morning till night, and
even then dread going home for fear of being murdered? Some may think this
too low a topic for me to expatiate upon, to which I answer, that it is a
charitable and Christian one, and therefore not in the least beneath the
consideration of any man who had a woman for his mother.
IV. By suppressing pretended Madhouses, where many of the Fair Sex are
unjustly confined, while their Husbands keep Mistresses, &c., and many
Widows are locked up for the sake of their Jointure.
The mention of this leads me to exclaim against the vile practice now so
much in vogue among the better sort as they are called, but the worst sort
in fact; namely, the sending their wives to madhouses, at every whim or
dislike, that they may be more secure and undisturbed in their
debaucheries; which wicked custom is got to such a head, that the number of
private madhouses in and about London are considerably increased within
these few years.
This is the height of barbarity and injustice in a Christian country, it is
a clandestine inquisition, nay worse.
How many ladies and gentlewomen are hurried away to these houses, which
ought to be suppressed, or at least subject to daily examination, as
hereafter shall be proposed?
How many, I say, of beauty, virtue, and fortune, are suddenly torn from
their dear innocent babes, from the arms of an unworthy man, whom they
love, perhaps, but too well, and who in return for that love, nay probably
an ample fortune and a lovely off spring besides, grows weary of the pure
streams of chaste love, and thirsting after the puddles of lawless lust,
buries his virtuous wife alive, that he may have the greater freedom with
his mistresses?
If they are not mad when they go into these cursed houses, they are soon
made so by the barbarous usage they there suffer; and any woman of spirit,
who has the least love for her husband, or concern for her family, cannot
sit down tamely under a confinement and separation the most unaccountable
and unreasonable.
Is it not enough to make any one mad to be suddenly clapped up, stripped,
whipped, ill-fed, and worse used? To have no reason assigned for such
treatment, no crime alleged, or accusers to confront? And what is worse, no
soul to appeal to but merciless creatures, who answer but in laughter,
surliness, contradiction, and too often stripes?
All conveniences for writing are denied, no messenger to be had to carry a
letter to any relation or friend; and if this tyrannical inquisition,
joined with the reasonable reflections a woman of any common understanding
must necessarily make, be not sufficient to drive any soul stark staring
mad, though before they were never so much in their right senses, I have no
more to say.
When by this means a wicked husband has driven a poor creature mad, and
robbed an injured wife of her reason, for it is much easier to create than
to cure madness, then has the villain a handle for his roguery; then,
perhaps, he will admit her distressed relations to see her, when it is too
late to cure the madness he so artfully and barbarously has procured.
But this is not all: sometimes more dismal effects attend this inquisition,
for death is but too often the cure of their madness and end of their
sorrows; some with ill usage, some with grief, and many with both, are
barbarously cut off in the prime of their years and flower of their health,
who otherwise might have been mothers of a numerous issue, and survived
many years. This is murder in the deepest sense, and much more cruel than
dagger or poison, because more lingering; they die by piecemeal, and in all
the agonies and terrors of a distracted mind.
Nay, it is murder upon murder, for the issue that might have been begot is
to be accounted for to God and the public. Now, if this kind of murder is
connived at, we shall no doubt have enough, nay, too much of it; for if a
man is weary of his wife, has spent her fortune, and wants another, it is
but sending her to a madhouse and the business is done at once.
How many have already been murdered after this manner is best known to just
Heaven, and those unjust husbands and their damned accomplices, who, though
now secure in their guilt, will one day find it is murder of the blackest
dye, has the least claim to mercy, and calls aloud for the severest
vengeance.
How many are yet to be sacrificed, unless a speedy stop be put to this most
accursed practice, I tremble to think; our legislature cannot take this
cause too soon in hand. This surely cannot be below their notice, and it
will be an easy matter at once to suppress all these pretended madhouses.
Indulge, gentle reader, for once the doting of an old man, and give him
leave to lay down his little system without arraigning him of arrogance or
ambition to be a lawgiver. In my humble opinion, all private madhouses
should be suppressed at once, and it should be no less than felony to
confine any person under pretence of madness without due authority.
For the cure of those who are really lunatic, licensed madhouses should be
constituted in convenient parts of the town, which houses should be subject
to proper visitation and inspection, nor should any person be sent to a
madhouse without due reason, inquiry, and authority.
It may be objected, by persons determined to contradict every thing and
approve nothing, that the abuses complained of are not so numerous or
heinous as I would insinuate. Why are not facts advanced, they will be apt
to say, to give a face of truth to these assertions? But I have two reasons
to the contrary; the first is, the more you convince them, the more angry
you make them, for they are never better pleased than when they have an
opportunity of finding fault; therefore, to curry favour with the
fault-finders, I have left them a loophole: the second and real is, because
I do not care to bring an old house over my head by mentioning particular
names or special cases, thereby drawing myself into vexatious prosecutions
and suits at law from litigious wretches, who would be galled to find their
villanies made public, and stick at no expense or foul play to revenge
themselves. Not but I could bring many instances, particularly of an
unhappy widow, put in by a villain of a husband, and now continued in for
the sake of her jointure by her unnatural son, far from common honesty or
humanity. Of another, whose husband keeps his mistress in black velvet, and
is seen with her every night at the opera or play, while his poor wife (by
much the finer woman, and of an understanding far superior to her
thick-skulled tyrant,) is kept mean in diet and apparel; nay, ill-used into
the bargain, notwithstanding her fortune supplies all the villain's
extravagances, and he has not a shilling but what came from her: but a
beggar when once set on horseback proves always the most unmerciful rider.
I cannot leave this subject without inserting one particular case.
A lady of known beauty, virtue, and fortune, nay more, of wisdom, not
flashy wit, was, in the prime of her youth and beauty, and when her senses
were perfectly sound, carried by her husband in his coach as to the opera;
but the coachmam had other instructions, and drove directly to a madhouse,
where the poor innocent lady was no sooner introduced, under pretence of
calling by the way to see some pictures he had a mind to buy, but the key
was turned upon her, and she left a prisoner by her faithless husband, who
while his injured wife was confined and used with the utmost barbarity, he,
like a profligate wretch, ran through her fortune with strumpets, and then
basely, under pretence of giving her liberty, extorted her to make over her
jointure, which she had no sooner done but he laughed in her face, and left
her to be as ill-used as ever. This he soon ran through, and (happily for
the lady) died by the justice of heaven in a salivation his debauches had
obliged him to undergo.
During her confinement, the villain of the madhouse frequently attempted
her chastity; and the more she repulsed him the worse he treated her, till
at last he drove her mad in good earnest. Her distressed brother, who is
fond of her to the last degree, now confines her in part of his own house,
treating her with great tenderness, but has the mortification to be assured
by the ablest physicians that his poor sister is irrecoverably distracted.
Numberless are the instances I could produce, but they would be accounted
fictitious, because I do not name the particular persons, for the reasons
before assigned; but the sufferings of these poor ladies are not
fictitious, nor are the villany of the madhouses, or the unnatural, though
fashionable barbarity of husbands, chimeras, but too solid grievances, and
manifest violations of the laws of God and man.
Most gracious and august queen Caroline! or nament of your sex, and pride
of the British nation! the best of mothers, the best of wives, the best of
women! Begin this auspicious reign with an action worthy your illustrious
self, rescue your injured sex from this tyranny, nor let it be in the power
of every brutal husband to cage and confine his wife at pleasure, a
practice scarce heard of till of late years. Nip it in the bud, most
gracious queen, and draw on yourself the blessings of numberless of the
fair sex, now groaning under the severest and most unjust bondage. Restore
them to their families; let them, by your means, enjoy light and liberty;
that while they fondly embrace, and with tears of joy weep over their dear
children, so long withheld from them, they may invoke accumulated blessings
from heaven upon your royal head!
And you, ye fair illustrious circle! who adorn the British court! and every
day surround our gracious queen: let generous pity inspire your souls, and
move you to intercede with your noble consorts for redress in this
injurious affair. Who can deny when you become suitors? and who knows but
at your request a bill may be brought into the house to regulate these
abuses? The cause is a noble and a common one, and ought to be espoused by
every lady who would claim the least title to virtue or compassion. I am
sure no honest member in either honourable house will be against so
reasonable a bill; the business is for some public-spirited patriot to
break the ice by bringing it into the house, and I dare lay my life it
passes.
I must beg my reader's indulgence, being the most immethodical writer
imaginable. It is true I lay down a scheme, but fancy is so fertile I often
start fresh hints, and cannot but pursue them; pardon therefore, kind
reader, my digressive way of writing, and let the subject, not the style or
method, engage thy attention.
Return we, therefore, to complain of destructive gaming-houses, the bane of
our youth, and ruin of our children and servants.
This is the most unprofitable evil upon earth, for it only tends to
alienate the proper current of specie, to maintain a pack of idle sharping
rascals, and beggar unwary gentlemen and traders.
I take the itch of gaming to be the most pernicious of vices, it is a kind
of avaricious madness; and if people have not sense to command themselves
by reason, they ought to be restrained by law; nor suffered to ruin
themselves and families, to enrich a crew of sharpers.
There is no playing on the square with these villains; they are sure to
cheat you, either by sleight of hand, confederacy, or false dice, &c.; they
have so much the odds of their infatuated bubbles, that they might safely
play a guinea to a shilling, and yet be sure of winning. This is but
genteel pocket picking, or felony with another name, and yet, so fond are
we of it, that from the footboy to the lord, all must have a touch of
gaming; and there are sharpers of different stations and denominations,
from Southwark-fair to the groom porters. Shame, that gentle men should
suffer every scoundrel to mix with them for gaming sake! And equal shame,
that honest laborious tradesmen should be obstructed in crossing the public
streets, by the gilt chariots of vagabond gamesters; who now infest the
land, and brave even our nobility and gentry with their own money.
But the most barbarous part of this hellish trade is what they call setting
of young gentlemen, apprentices, and others; this ought to be deemed felony
without benefit of clergy; for it is the worst of thievery. Under prete nee
of taking a bottle, or spending an evening gaily, they draw their cull to
the tavern, where they sit not long before the devil's bones or books are
found accidentally on purpose, by the help of which they strip my gentleman
in an instant, and then generously lend him his own money, to lose afresh,
and create a debt which is but too often more justly paid than those more
justly din.
If we look into some late bankruptcies we shall find some noted gamesters
the principal creditors; I think, in such cases it would be but justice to
make void the gamester's debt, and subject his estate to make good the
deficiencies of the bankrupt's effects. If traders have no more wit, the
public should have pity on them; and make it as penal to lose as to win;
and, in truth, if cards, dice, &c., were totally suppressed, industry and
arts would increase the more; gaming may make a man crafty, but not polite;
one may understand cards and dice perfectly well, and be a blockhead in
everything else.
I am sorry to see it so prevalent in the city among the trading part of
mankind, who have introduced it into their clubs, and play so high of late
that many bankrupts have been made by this pernicious practice.
It is the bane of all conversation; and those who can't sit an hour without
gaming, should never go into a club to spoil company. In a word, it is mere
madness, and a most stupid thing to hazard one's fortune, and perplex one's
mind; nay, to sit up whole nights, poring over toys of pipped ivory and
painted pasteboard, making ourselves worse than little children, whose
innocent sports we so much ridicule.
To sum up all, I think it would be a noble retribution, to subject
gamesters' estates to the use and support of the poor widows and orphans of
their unfortunate bubbles.
Sunday debauches are abuses that call loud for amendment; it is in this
pernicious soil the seeds of ruin are first sown. Instead of a day of rest,
we make it a day of labour, by toiling in the devil's vineyard; and but too
many surfeit themselves with the fruits of gluttony, drunkenness, and
uncleanness.
Not that I am so superciliously strict, to have the sabbath kept as rigidly
here as in Scotland, but then there ought to be a medium between the
severity of a fast, and the riot of Saturnalia. Instead of a decent and
cheerful solemnity, our taverns and publichouses have more business that
day than all the week beside. Our apprentices plume themselves; nay, some
scruple not to put on their swords and tie wigs, or toupees, and the loose
end of the town is their rendezvous, Sunday being market-day all round the
hundreds of Drury.
While we want servants to do our work, those hundreds, as they call them,
are crowded with numbers of idle impudent sluts, who love sporting more
than spinning, and inveigle our youth to their ruin; nay, many old lechers,
beasts as they are! steal from their families, and seek these harlots'
lurking holes, to practise their unaccountable schemes of new invented
lewdnesses; some half hang themselves, others are whipped, some lie under a
table and gnaw the bones that are thrown them, while others stand slaving
among a parcel of drabs at a washing tub. Strange that the inclination
should not die with the power, but that old fools should make themselves
the prey and ridicule of a pack of strumpets!
Some heedless youths are wheedled into marriage, which makes them and their
unhappy parents miserable all their lives; others are drawn into
extravagancies, and but too often run into their master's cash, and for
fear of a discovery, make away with themselves, or at least run away and
leave their distracted parents in a thousand tears; not to mention the
frustration of their fortune, and the miseries that attend a vagabond life.
Thus honest parents lose their children, and traders their apprentices, and
all from a liberty we have of late given our youth of rambling abroad on
Sundays; for many, nowadays will lie out all night, or stay out so late to
give no small disturbance in sober families. It therefore behoves every
master of a family to have his servants under his eye; and if the going to
church, meeting, or whatever place of worship suited their religion, were
more enforced, it would be so much the better.
In short, the luxury of the age will be the ruin of the nation, if not
prevented. We leave trade to game in stocks; we live above ourselves, and
barter our ready money for trifles; tea and wine are all we seem anxious
for, and God has given the blessings of life to an ungrateful people, who
despise their own productions. Our very plough-fellows drink wine nowadays;
our farmers, graziers, and butchers, are above malt liquors; and the
wholesome break fast of water-gruel and milk potage is changed for coffee
and tea. This is the reason provisions and corn, &c., are so dear; we all
work for vintners, and raise our prices one upon another to such a degree,
it will be an impossibility to live, and we shall, of course, become our
own devourers.
We strain at a gnat and swallow a camel; and, in this instance, the
publichouses are kept open to furnish our luxury, while we deny ourselves
other necessaries of life, out of a scruple of conscience. For example; in
extreme hot weather, when meat will not keep from Saturday to Sunday, we
throw, or cause to be thrown away, vast quantities of tainted meat, and
have generally stinking dinners, because the butchers dare not sell a joint
of meat on a Sunday morning. Now, though I would not have the Sabbath so
far violated as to have it a market-day, yet, rather than abuse God's
mercies by throwing away creatures given for our use, nay, for our own
healths and cleanliness sake, I would have the same indulgence in extreme
hot weather, as there is for milk and mackerel; that is to say, that meat
might be killed in the cool of the morning, viz., one or two of the clock,
and sold till nine, and no longer; nor should villanous informers have
power to molest them in this innocent and reasonable amendment of a
ridiculous vulgar error.
I cannot forbear taking notice of the extravagant use, or rather abuse, of
that nauseous liquor called Geneva, among our lower sort. Those who deny
that an inferior class of people are most necessary in a body politic,
contradict reason and experience itself, since they are most useful when
industrious, and as pernicious when lazy. By their industry our
manufactures, trade, and commerce are carried on; the merchant in his
counting-house, and the captain in his cabin, would find but little
employment were it not that many hands carried on the different branches of
the concern they superintended.
But now, so far are our common people infatuated with Geneva, that half the
work is not done now as formerly. It debilitates and enervates them, and
they are not near so strong and healthy as formerly. This accursed liquor
is in itself so diuretic, it overstrains the parts of generation, and makes
our common people incapable of getting such lusty children as they used to
do. Add to this, that the women, by drinking it, spoil their milk, and by
giving it to young children, as they foolishly do, spoil the stomach, and
hinder digestion; so that in less than an age, we may expect a fine
spindle-shanked generation.
There is not in nature so unhealthy a liquor as Geneva, especially as
commonly sold; it curdles the blood, it stupifies the senses, it weakens
the nerves, it spoils the eyesight, and entirely ruins the stomach; nay,
some stomachs have been rendered so cold by the use of Geneva, that lamp
spirits have not been a dram warm enough for them. Surely they will come to
drink aquafortis at last!
On the contrary, our own malt liquors, especially common draught beer, is
most wholesome and nourishing, and has brought up better generations than
the present: it is strengthening, cooling, and balsamic; it helps
digestion, and carries nourishment with it; and, in spite of the whims of
some physicians, is most pertinent to a human, especially a good wholesome
English, constitution. Nay, the honest part of the faculty deny not the use
of small beer, well brewed, even in fevers. I, myself, have found great
benefit by it; and if it be good in its kind, it is the finest jalap upon
earth.
If this abuse of Geneva be not stopped, we may go whoop for husbandmen,
labourers, &c. Trade must consequently stand still, and the credit of the
nation sink; nor is the abatement of the excise, though very considerable,
and most worthy notice, any ways comparable to the corruption of manners,
the destruction of health, and all the train of evils we are threatened
with from pernicious Geneva.
An effectual method to prevent street robberies.
THE principal encouragements and opportunity given to street robbers is,
that our streets are so poorly watched; the watchmen, for the most part,
being decrepit, superannuated wretches, with one foot in the grave and the
other ready to follow; so feeble that a puff of breath can blow them down.
Poor crazy mortals! much fitter for an almshouse than a watchhouse. A city
watched and guarded by such animals is wretchedly watched indeed.
Nay, so little terror do our watchmen carry with them, that hardy thieves
make a mere jest of them, and sometimes oblige even the very watchman who
should apprehend them to light them in their roguery. And what can a poor
creature do, in terror of his life, surrounded by a pack of ruffians, and
no assistance near?
Add to this, that our rogues are grown more wicked than ever, and vice in
all kinds is so much winked at, that robbery is accounted a petty crime. We
take pains to puff them up in their villany, and thieves are set out in so
amiable a light in the Beggar's Opera, that it has taught them to value
themselves on their profession rather than be ashamed of it.
There was some cessation of street robberies, from the time of Bunworth and
Blewitt's execution, until the introduction of this pious opera. Now we
find the Cartouchian villanies revived, and London, that used to be the
most safe and peaceful city in the universe, is now a scene of rapine and
danger. If some of Cartouch's gang be not come over to instruct our
thieves, and propagate their schemes, we have, doubtless, a Cartouch of our
own, and a gang which, if not suppressed, may be full as pernicious as ever
Cartouch's was, and London will be as dangerous as Paris, if due care be
not taken.
We ought to begin our endeavours to suppress these villanies, first by
heavenly, and then by earthly means.
By heavenly means, in enforcing and encouraging a reformation of manners,
by suppressing of vice and immorality, and punishing profaneness and
licentiousness. Our youth are corrupted by filthy, lewd ballads, sung and
sold publicly in our streets; nay, unlicensed and unstamped,
notwithstanding acts of parliament to the contrary.
Coachmen, carmen, &c., are indulged in swearing after the most blasphemous,
shocking, and unaccountable rate that ever was known. New oaths and
blasphemies are daily uttered and invented; and rather than not exercise
this hellish talent, they will vent their curses on their very horses; and,
oh stupid! damn the blood of a post, rather than want something to curse.
Our common women, too, have learned this vice; and not only strumpets, but
labouring women, who keep our markets, and vend things about street, swear
and curse at a most hideous rate. Their children learn it from their
parents, and those of the middle, or even the better sort of people, if
they pass through the streets to school, or to play, catch the infection,
and carry home such words as must consequently be very shocking to sober
parents.
Our youth, in general, have too much liberty; the Sabbath is not kept with
due solemnity; masters and mistresses of families are too remiss in the
care of the souls committed to their charge. Family prayer is neglected;
and, to the shame of scoffers be it spoken, too much ridiculed. All ages
and sexes, if in health, should be obliged to attend public worship,
according to their respective opinions. Were it only to keep youth out of
harm's way it would do well. But it is to be hoped, if their parents,
masters, or mistresses, should oblige their attendance at public devotion,
they would edify by what they should hear, and many wicked acts would be
stifled in their infancy, and checked even in the intention, by good and
useful doctrine.
Our common people make it a day of debauch, and get so drunk on a Sunday
they cannot work for a day or two following. Nay, since the use of Geneva
has become so common, many get so often drunk they cannot work at all, but
run from one irregularity to another, till at last they become arrant
rogues. And this is the foundation of all our present complaints.
We will suppose a man able to maintain himself and family by his trade, and
at the same time to be a Geneva drinker. This fellow first makes himself
incapable of working by being continually drunk; this runs him behindhand,
and he either pawns or neglects his work, for which reason no body will
employ him. At last, fear of arrests, his own hunger, the cries of his
family for bread, his natural desire to support an irregular life, and a
propense hatred to labour, turn but too many an honest tradesman into an
arrant desperate rogue. And these are commonly the means that furnish us
with thieves and villains in general.
Thus is a man, that might be useful in a body politic, rendered obnoxious
to the same: and if this trade of wickedness goes on, they will grow and
increase upon us, insomuch that we shall not dare to stir out of our
habitations; nay, it will be well if they arrive not to the impudence of
plundering our houses at noonday.
Where is the courage of the English nation, that a gentleman, with six or
seven servants, shall be robbed by one single highwayman? Yet we have
lately had instances of this; and for this we may thank our effeminacy, our
toupee wigs, and powdered pates, our tea, and other scandalous fopperies;
and, above all, the disuse of noble and manly sports, so necessary to a
brave people, once in vogue, but now totally lost among us.
Let not the reader think I run from my subject if I search the bottom of
the distemper before I propose a cure, which having done, though indeed but
slightly, for this is an argument could be carried to a much greater
length, I proceed next to propose earthly means in the manner following.
Let the watch be composed of stout able-bodied men, and of those at least
treble the number now subsisting, that is to say, a watchman to every forty
houses, twenty on one side of the way, and twenty on the other; for it is
observable that a man cannot well see distinctly beyond the extent of
twenty houses in a row; if it is a single row, and no opposite houses, the
charge must be greater and their safety less. This man should be elected
and paid by the housekeepers themselves, to prevent misapplication and
abuse, so much complained of in the distribution of public money.
He should be allowed ten shillings per annum by each housekeeper, which at
forty houses, as above specified, amounts to 207. per annum, almost treble
to what is at present allowed; and yet most house keepers are charged at
least 2s. 6d. a quarter to the watch, whose beat is, generally speaking,
little less than the compass of half a mile.
This salary is something of encouragement, and a pretty settlement to a
poor man, who with frugality may live decently thereon, and by due rest be
enabled to give vigilant attendance.
If a housekeeper break, or a house is empty, the poor watchman ought not to
suffer, the deficiency should be made up by the housekeepers remaining.
Or, indeed, all housekeepers might be excused, if a tax of only one
shilling per annum were levied on every bachelor within the bills of
mortality, and above the age of one-and-twenty, who is not a housekeeper:
for these young sparks are a kind of unprofitable gentry to the state; they
claim public safety and advantages, and yet pay nothing to the public; nay,
indeed, they in a manner live upon the public, for (on a Sunday especially)
at least a million of these gentlemen quarter themselves upon the married
men, and rob many families of part of a week's provision, more particularly
when they play a good knife and fork, and are of the family of the Tuckers.
I beg pardon for this whimsical proposal, which, ludicrous as it seems, has
something in it; and may be improved. Return we, in the mean time, to our
subject.
The watch thus stationed, strengthened, and encouraged, let every watchman
be armed with fire arms and sword; and let no watchman stand above twenty
doors distant from his fellow.
Let each watchman be provided with a bugle-horn, to sound on alarm, or in
time of danger; and let it be made penal, if not felony, for any but a
watchman to sound a horn in and about the city, from the time of their
going on, to that of their going off.
An objection will be here made on account of the postboys, to obviate
which, I had thoughts of a bell, but that would be too ponderous and
trouble some for a watchman to carry, besides his arms and lantern. As to a
fixed bell, if the watchman is at another part of his walk, how can he give
notice? Besides, rogues may play tricks with the bell; whereas a horn is
portable, always ready, and most alarming.
Let the postboys therefore use some other signal, since this is most
convenient to this more material purpose. They may cary a bell in a holster
with ease, and give notice by that, as well as those who collect the
letters.
That the watchmen may see from one end of their walks to the other, let a
convenient number of lamps be set up, and those not of the convex kind,
which blind the eyes, and are of no manner of use; they dazzle, but give no
distinct light: and further, rather than prevent robberies, many, deceived
and blinded by these ignes fatui, have been run over by coaches, carts, &c.
People stumble more upon one another, even under these very lamps, than in
the dark. In short, they are most unprofitable lights, and in my opinion,
rather abuses than benefits.
Besides, I see no reason why every ten house keepers cannot find a lamp
among themselves, and let their watchman dress it, rather than fatten a
crew of directors; but we are so fond of companies, it is a wonder we have
not our shoes blacked by one, and a set of directors made rich at the
expense of our very black-guards. Convenient turnpikes and stoppages may be
made to prevent escapes, and it will be proper for a watchman to be placed
at one of these, fixed at the end of a lane, court, alley, or other
thoroughfare, which may happen in any part of his beat, and so as not to
obstruct his view to both ends thereof, or being able to give notice, as
aforesaid; for the watch ought to be in view, as well as in the hearing of
each other, or they may be overpowered, and much danger may happen.
The streets thus guarded and illuminated, what remains but that the money
allotted by the government be instantly paid on conviction of every of
fender; for delays in this case are of dangerous consequence, and nobody
will venture their lives in hopes of a reward, if it be not duly and timely
paid. If there is reason of complaint on this head, it ought to be looked
into by those at the helm; for nothing can be more vile than for underlings
to abuse the benevolence of the public, or their superiors, by sinking,
abridging, or delaying public or private benefits. And it is by no means
below the dignity or care, even of the greatest, to see the disposal of
their own bounty and charity; for it loses but too often by the carriage:
and where a nobleman or other generous person has ordered five guineas to
be given, it is well if the proper object has had even one.
Something allowed by the Chamber of London to every person apprehending a
robber, would have a good effect, especially if it be not told over a
gridiron, but paid without delay or abatement. And what if the fewer
custards are eat, so it augment the public safety.
Some of our common soldiery are, and I hope unjustly, suspected. This may
be easily confuted, if strict orders are enforced, that none but commission
or warrant officers shall be out of their quarters after ten at night. But
if we consider, that neither Blewit, Bunworth, or their gangs, were
soldiers, and that of those who have been executed for ten years past, not
one in ten were soldiers, but, on the contrary, seamen discharged and
thrown on the public without present subsistence, which makes them
desperate; but I hope the act now depending for the encouragement of
seamen, &c., will sufficiently remove that obstacle also. This, I hope,
will stop the mouths of censorious persons, who unjustly arraign our
soldiery for the vices of others. However, to make all easy, I believe the
generality of them will gladly submit to the restraint proposed, merely to
show their innocence.
Mean time, would his most sacred majesty let them partake of his bounty, as
the officers, &c., have done, and raise their pay, were it but one penny
per diem, it would be a most royal bounty, would considerably contribute to
their support, and put them above any sordid views: and there was nejrer
more occasion than now, when provisions of all kinds are so excessive dear.
Having offered my little mite to the public, I beg they will excuse the
deficiency of my style, and multitude of my errors, for my intention's
sake. I write without prospect of gain; if I am censured, it is what I can
but expect; but if among all my schemes one proves of service, my desires
and labours are amply answered.
Omissions.
In my scheme for an university in London I proposed only a hall or public
room; on recollection I find it should be a large house or inn, in the
nature of a college, with store of convenient rooms for gentlemen, not only
to study separately, but wherein to lodge their books, for it would be most
inconvenient to lug them backwards and forwards. They may indeed breakfast,
sup, and sleep at home, but it will be highly necessary they should dine in
commons, or at least near the college; not that I would have cooks,
butlers, caterers, manciples, and the whole train of college cannibals
retained; but for fear they should stay too long at home, or be hindered
from returning to study in due time, some proper place or person might be
pitched upon to keep an ordinary, at a prefixed price and hour, and for the
students only.
My reasons are these:
First, A young gentleman may live too far from college.
Second, The college hours for dinner may not agree with those of the
family.
Third, Company may drop in and detain him.
These being, I think, the only material objections could be offered, I hope
I have amply provided against them, and rendered my project more perfect
and unexceptionable.
One omission I made in the discourse on mad houses, &c., is, that maiden
ladies as well as widows and wives are liable to the inquisition there
complained of, and I am informed a good estate is lately come to a
worthless family by the death, or rather murder, of an innocent young
creature, who being left very rich, chose to live with her friends; but
well had it been for her had she taken up her abode among strangers, for
they staved off all proposals for marriage a considerable time, and when at
last they found the lady would not be hindered from altering her condition,
she was hurried away to a madhouse, where she miserably ended her days,
while they rioted in the pillage of her fortune. Thus neither maid, wife,
or widow, are safe while these accursed madhouses are suffered; nay, I see
no reason, if the age improves in wickedness, as in all probability it may,
but the men, per contra, may take their turns. Younger brothers, &c., may
clap up their elders, and jump into their estates, for there are no
questions asked at these madhouses, but who is the paymaster, and how much;
give them but their price, mad or not mad, it is no matter whom they
confine; so that if any person lives longer than his relations think
convenient, they know their remedy; it is but sending them to a madhouse
and the estate is their own.
Having answered all that I think liable to objection, and recollected what
I had omitted, I desire to stand or fall by the judgment of the serious
part of mankind; wherein they shall correct me I will kiss the rod and
suffer with patience; but if a pack of hackney scribblers shall attack me
only by way of a get-penny, I shall not be provoked to answer them, be they
never so scurrilous, lest I be accounted as one of them.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TO LIEUTENANT-COLONEL SAMUEL ROBINSON.
SIR,
I SHALL congratulate you on your election into the chamberlainship of the
city of London, or otherwise, as you shall acquit yourself in answering
candidly and impartially to the following queries.
I. whether there is not money sufficient in the chamber of London to pay
off the orphan's fund? Or if not a sufficient sum, what sum it is, and what
is the deficiency? How long it has lain there, and what interest has been
made upon it?
II. If there are not considerable arrears due from many wards, and what
those arrears are?
III. Who are these poor orphans we pay so much money to? and whether they
are not some of the richest men in the city of London, who have got the
stock into their own hands, and find it so snug a fund they do not care to
get out of it.
IV. If it would not be much better to gather in the arrears, join them to
the money in the office, and collect the overplus at once, rather than
suffer the tax to become eternal, and to pay so much interest.
This is but a reasonable request; and if colonel Robinson is the honest
gentleman fame reports him to be, he will make no scruple to give a ready
answer. And indeed it will be but a handsome return made to his fellow
citizens for their choice of him, to begin his office with such an act of
justice, honesty, and public satisfaction, for many people do not know what
is meant by the orphan's tax; they pay it with remorse, and think
themselves aggrieved. Even those who know the reason of the fund think it
has been continued long enough, wish it were once paid off, suspect some
secret in the affair, and give their tongues the liberty all losers claim;
Our fathers, say they, have eaten sour grapes, and our teeth are set on
edge, we are visited for their transgressions, and may be to the world's
end, unless we shall find an honest chamberlain who will unveil this cloudy
affair, and gives us a prospect of relief.
Thus, sir, it lies at your door to gain the applause of the whole city, a
few misers excepted, by a generous and gentlemanlike discovery of this
affair. And you are thus publicly called upon, that your discovery may be
as public and beneficial to all. If you comply, I shall think you an honest
man, above a fellow feeling, or being biassed, and most worthy your office;
if not, give me leave to think, the citizens of London have made but an
indifferent choice.
I am,
Sir, Yours, as you prove yourself,
ANDREW MORETON.
Sept. 23, 1728.
THE END OF AUGUSTA TRIUMPHANS.
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